Like a musical, but ...

This past week I became an expert in Issue 382 of Vegetarian Times, damn-near exhausting the entire magazine with nary a dud. And because Chuck is sick, I was able to make eyeball-wheezingly spicy dishes that he could eat because of a thick coating of mucus standing between him and the body parts involved with taste. That is what I call success.

I also had good news on the YMCA front: They kicked all the U-18s out of the women's locker room. Even the ones that can't walk and talk -- yet still enjoy the acoustics of a shower area when paired with nonsense songs. Also: I learned that I can stream Netflix while I'm on an elliptical machine, which means knocking out plenty of strides/day while being distracted by moving pictures of my choosing. I wish I knew who to give a coupon for a free make out to.

My friend Lil Latrell sent us a bunch of brownies in a jar and I've been going apeshit on them. She wrote about sending them to another friend for her birthday on her baking blog.

And I finished "Infinite Jest." Yay.

Anyway, here is what I cooked, watched and read.

FOODS

Sweet and Spicy Carrot Bisque: The magic ingredient here is banana. This was really tasty and really easy and just enough spicy. This actually cured Chuck's cold for about eight minutes.

Spicy Shirataki Noodles: This caught my attention because they compared it to Thai Drunken Noodles, one of my favorite foods for voluntary tongue and lip inflammation. I haven't been to Thai Krathong, our local hot spot that makes an awesome batch of this stuff, for, like, evs. This didn't match their version, but it got me close enough to stave off withdrawal.

Kale Lasagna Diavolo: Lasagna. With kale. The goat cheese is really noticeable, which is either good or bunk, depending on if you like goat cheese. Or not. I don't like goat cheese and dug this just fine.

Chilaquiles: This was actually the grand-prize winning entree in VT's recipe contest, and it is a doozy. There are seemingly a thousand steps involved with making, essentially, a salsa with baked tortilla strips that is mixed with eggs and baked to this casserole consistency. I loved loved loved this one.

MOVIES
Cropsey: This was almost a super-awesome documentary about kids that went missing on Staten Island in the 1970s, and how it tied into this urban legend about a child killer, but the rookie filmmakers screwed it up by including themselves in the film. Boo.

Three O'Clock High: I remember the exact circumstances of seeing this when I was in grade school or junior high. A girl in my class showed it to us after school, and I was surprised I had never heard of something that turned out to be so hilarious. A sort of school-day-in-the-life of a nerdy kid who is going to get his clock cleaned at the 3 o'clock bell. Chaos ensues. Anyway, later that girl would not be allowed to hang out with me for circumstances having to do with her mom and dad's messy divorce, and my dad's job in law enforcement. To this day, she has ignored my Facebook friend request. (I had no idea until well into high school that we had a family feud).

Antichrist (The Criterion Collection) I didn't finish this sort of art pic because Chuck woke up and I didn't want to subject another living being to a film where Willem Defoe stumbles on a fox that has had its intestines ripped out and the fox says to him "Chaos Reigns!" Mostly this movie is like a musical, except for instead of breaking into song, the characters break out into rutting.

BOOK
Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace: If you have any desire to read Infinite Jest, you should read Infinite Jest. It's good enough that even the boring chunks are tolerable.

I haven't written more than a lick about this yet, but when I do it will be at Minnesota Reads.

I'm currently working on Although Of Course You End Up Becoming Yourself: A Road Trip with David Foster Wallace and An Object of Beauty: A Novel.