when i got home, chuck was playing mario galaxy and said this sentence me:
"after getting instructions from a talking penguin, i'm riding on a fish's back down a river in the sky."
we made some chump from pizza luce bring dinner to the front door: shrimp pesto pizza, artichoke dip and tiramisu. i cracked a bottle at 12:30 a.m., then proceeded to stay up until 6 a.m., listening to music and watching classic lita ford/ozzy osborne on mtv.com. then i slept until 3:30 p.m. and woke to a few cruel realities:
1. despite carefully plotting my wine purchases to minimize my chances of waking with a headache, my brain won and there it was, an 11 pound ball of compost banging against my skull.
2. my assault on the weather had been in vain. the accumulation of snow was laughable.
i plodded around the apartment. canceled plans out in the world that called for pants and clean hair. watched four episodes of "it's always sunny in philadelphia." we passed a giant chocolate covered rice crispie bar back and forth, taking bites and making chocolate skid marks on our front teeth.
"who are we?" chuck asked.
"people who sit in bed watching tv and eating rice krispie bars," i said.
"in other words, awesome?" he asked.
then i waged a battled with narcolepsy for an hour and woke craving potato chips.
by now, chuck had reached the level where he turns into a bee in mario galaxy.
i made a grocery wish list, compiling every craving that could hit in the next two days:
salty potato chips
2, no 4 cokes
soft shell tortillas
at the grocery store, i added corn dogs to the mix. as these items rolled down the conveyor belt, i realized that i was the very person whose items would gross me out if i was standing behind myself in line.
"corn dogs, potato chips, coke and cookies. now we're eating like a daycare center!" chuck said.
by the end of this weekend, i'll have been wearing a hooded lourdes sweatshirt and green sweatpants for 64 hours.