Monday, July 14, 2008

sufferin' succ-oh whatever ...

so this past week i heard a terrible story about maggots and my old apartment. but i don't live there anymore.

onward:


dirty.

FOODS I MAKE
fresh rhubarb pie: another week, another batch o'hubarb. i had an unfortunate moment involving baking and tin-foiling the crust, when i realized all of the tinfoil was splayed across the bedroom window so that we can sleep peacefully everyday until after 1 p.m. if we choose.

a) is it sanitary to use tinfoil that has been a sunblock for the past month, to keep the crust from burning?
b) and even if it is, is nonburnt crust more important than a dark bedroom?

no. so i invented a new kind of crust that doesn't have edges.

edamame succotash: not so much "making" as chopping and stirring. but this mix of corn, red bell pepper, edamame, garlic, onion, parsley, basil, oil, white wine and salt and pepper is easy, colorful and yum. i made a trough of it.


look! it's like a bowl of skittles.

MEALS TAKEN IN PUBLIC



midi, pecan crusted salmon w/ asapargus and mashed potatoes: not only is this my favorite thing to eat at midi, it's the only thing i've ever tried. three times. in fact, if you say 'midi' to me, i'll think of this salmon dish. what's weird is that i don't even like pecans. hmm.


meanwhile, chuck got a seafood pasta: penne noodles still oozing with the sea. "ew," he said when it was set in front of him. "this smells fishy." he regretted most bites of his meal, which means that for once i won the food ordering competition!

we were seated next to a gaping picture window with a view of the lake, every blue hair who halfassedly tossed a bean bag without removing the purse from her shoulder, and every fitgers employee with a taste for the nicotene. all this with a frank sinatra soundtrack. two tables away, a man read his newspaper, while a woman read her book.

chuck said: the music, combined with the big window to stare out of made me feel like i was eating in a nursing home.

READING
"into the forest" by jean heglund: if i had read this book when i was 14, i would now be one of those people who could discern which berries in the woods are poisonous and i'd probably know how to sew. it's a story of sisters -- one a ballerina, the other an encyclopedia reader -- who try to stay alive in their country home after the world has run out of electricity and gas and the guy who owns sam's club sits in his dark, ransacked store with a rifle. first they make do with things in the house, then they learn to stay alive from resources in the forest.

very realistic and a real thinker.

TV WARTCHING
"the bachelorette": i no longer consider this show humane. and even worse, thanks to deanna's pick, i now owe jcrew a margarita. DEANNA PAPPAS YOU OWE ME AT LEAST $4!

SILVER SCREENING
"hard candy" 2004: ellen page of juno [literally, she's the same droll smart ass] fame stars, wearing the exact hair and face as i had in fourth grade, in a public service announcement to pedophiles about the dangers of this particular proclivity. this movie has a lot, a lot of talking. and i couldn't even watch one of the more significant parts of the storyline because it made me wan and uncomfortable.

"ghostbusters," 1984: i'd never seen this movie before, as i was not allowed to watch it when it came out and then just never doubled back.

for those keeping track at home:
THINGS I WAS NOT ALLOWED TO DO WHEN I WAS GROWING UP:
1. watch mtv
2. eat sugar cereals
3. watch dukes of hazzard
4. see ghostbusters
5. own "like a virgin" or "purple rain"
6. hang out behind the jiffy mart.

AND GRATUITOUS EXTRAS:

my second trip in eight years to the portland malt shoppe: this is a strawberry cheesecaked double scoop that chuck is afraid to hold for fear of damage.


5 comments:

J-Money said...

But did your parents go so far as to have MTV blocked? Because mine did. They also took my Def Leppard cassettes and read passages from Tipper Gore's book (Raising PG Kids in an X-Rated Society) aloud to me and my friend(s).

I also couldn't have Pixie Stix, but that was kind of my fault, stemming from an unfortunate incident at the Air Show.

diatribes and dish said...

i watched "hard candy" after skimming a review ... i thought it was described as "a sexy thriller" ... either the reviewer didn't watch the movie or i misread the review because it was neither sexy nor thrilling. i had wince-face for a whole day afterwards.

Whiskeymarie said...

Naked mannequins and food porn?
I didn't realize this was THAT kind of blog.

Be grateful your parents blocked/banned/forbade stuff. Mine didn't & look how well that worked out.

Semi-Charmed said...

My parents let me watch MTV, and just be happy you weren't one day lounging on the family sofa at age 9, when "Nuthin but a G Thang" came on, both your parents watching, and dying of embarassment when they show the scene of the girl getting her bikini top pulled off. Or the other girl getting sexily covered in champagne.
Same goes for sex scenes in any movie or TV show.
To a kid, this is the most humiliating scenerio imaginable. I'm sure my parents laughed at my red face when I left the room.

christina said...

oh my. i was in college when that song came out.