Monday, July 7, 2008

clever sever ...

this past week i learned that if you tell the good people of the internet you need book cases, they will magically appear on the doorstep [thanks, e&t!] and completely reconfigure your entire fiction section. i also learned that, for the self proclaimed queen of the neighborhood watch team, i can't tell the difference between gun shots and firecrackers very well.

also. i wondered if anyone in the world has ever tried using proactiv, and if it worked. because i found myself staring at a proactiv vending machine at the mall and saying aloud: "well, it worked for jessica simpson. and you know, i think i trust her."



hacienda del sol, huevos rancheros: silly me, i didn't realize this was a soup. my entire lap became saturated in gooey tomato innards, yoke and um, runny beans? while it tasted like regular,
solid huevos rancheros, it looked like someone microwaved the contents of my stomach after a night of binge drinking. i was envious of chuck's chorizo burrito, mostly because he wasn't getting chunks of refried bean wedged in his margarita straw.

however, this remains the best non-lake view deck in the entire city. and, like every time i'm there, i wish i was having at least two more margaritas, although a tastier version, and four more friends joining me.

chester creek cafe, falafel sandwich: i was moved to tears by the description of one of the pasta dishes, made with homemade moz, including pancetta and some other things -- i think i saw the word "lemon."

and when the table next to us got it, i was thoroughly sold. but the kitchen ran out exactly one table before i could order it. meanwhile, to my left, the old man was passing his pasta dish around the table ... his friends nodding and biting and talking about how GREAT it was. he looked pretty proud. like the pancetta was actually slivers of meat from his own hind end.

i went with the falafel sandwich, instead.

then two tables away, the entire group received their pasta entree. those were the buggers who made them run out. more nodding and cooing. a few overheard: best meal evers.

the old man passed his plate around for one more lap. he was so giving! why not pass it up here, too, mister! no dice.

the falafel was fine. probably even good even.

the watson twins' cover of the cure's "just like heaven" and a lot of my morning jackets' new cd "evil urges."

"riding the bullet" 2004: the year is indicernable, but seems to be in an era where the beatles are alive and functioning -- although not together. our hero -- ripe from a suicide contemplation turned accidentally wrist slashing -- has tickets to see john lennon perform, but finds out his mother recently had a stroke. instead he must hitchhike 150 miles to see her.

along the way, he sees dead people and hides from the reaper. this movie was a laughably horrible take on a stephen king short story. it screamed 1990-something from its faux ethan hawke star to its cuts from real to surreal and its vapid woe is me flannel shirt introspection. this is truthfully the worst movie i've ever seen.

"the hitcher" 2007: i like when my stars of teen soap operas hit the big screen. sophia bush, of one tree hill, stars as a short skirt, long boot-wearing girlfriend who is taking her boyfriend home to meet her friends. they offer a ride to a creepy killer who seems intent on leaving a trail of massacre in their wake. meanwhile, sophia bush climbs, hides, and shrieks and must have, at some point, wished she was wearing something from the adidas collection. in its most compelling scene, our hero kicks open the door of a burning truck and emerges all tank toppy and rambo from the back in a very segourney weaver in aliens scene that must make some sort of frat-boy "best of" list. her boyfriend's death scene is a clever severing that is as disgusting as it is creative.

"my horizontal life" by chelsea handler: while i usually think i'm current on current events, i must still have some sort of vaccuum because i'd never heard of chelsea handler i heard her name twice in one day. this usually means the universe wants me to investigate.

it. is. hilarious.

next up for reading: post apocolyptic young adult fiction. weeee!

"the bachelorette:"

* if jeremy's parents hadn't died, he'd officially be more boring than church.
* jason, much like shayne lamos from last season of the bachelor, has defied all of my expectations and is now my favorite. i used to think he was a weinie, and i still do, but i now am in favor of weinies. he makes me weepie.

[side note: just caught a glimpse of chris harrison's handwriting on jason's sweet seduction recipe card and it is quite girlie.]

* i'm done with jesse. he's great, but he's going to rebound from this like a skateboarder's teeth off the steps of city hall when she picks jason in the final.

deanna had some rough moments early on, but this girl is a smarty party. she saw a raging psychopath lingering beneath jeremy's surface. when he asked the limo to stop, i thought he was going to fake barf in the bushes, or run back to the party. instead he just made rabid screeching about how this is just like when his fake mom and fake dad died.


nanners said...

I thought it was really funny when, during the men tell all thing, one of the guys likened jeremy to the american psycho dude. see what you missed?

GCH said...

Proactive changed my life. It not only made my face clear up within days, but after I stopped using it, my skin had totally changed for the better. That was 6 years ago and it's still awesome. I tell anyone that will listen that it is the greatest product of all time. Totally try it!

Whiskeymarie said...

That picture of your Hacienda meal is the very reason I never eat a full meal there anymore.
Chips & salsa with a margarita on the patio? Great. Anything more? Not so much.

Purple said...

I am watching the bachelorette, and am so pissed-off right now. I am not watching the last five minutes. DeAnna! What have you done! Her reject is totally welcome to fall in love with me.

Krupskaya said...

I used to love Hacienda but I've found that in the last couple years they've tended more to Cheese Overload -- which, from me, is saying something.

Kristabella said...

Well, you know I am the only other one watching The Bachelorette. I was shocked about Jeremy, only because I thought for sure she would pick him. I thought when he stopped the limo that he was going back to murder her and Jason. I like Jason. I thought the kid thing would bother her, but I don't think it does. Hopefully whoever she picks will work out so that I don't have to see Ryan and Trista EVER AGAIN.

And also, as far as Proactiv, it works, but only for a little bit. It has a low percentage of Benzoyl Peroxide and your skin gets used to that low dosage after a while and it stops working.

BCookie said...

Sorry we sold out of the penne right before you ordered. It was a crazy night!!!!! We will be running that particular pasta for one more week and then the menu changes. (Kavatappi with grilled summer vegetables and shrimp, tossed in our garden-fresh herb oil and a fire roasted red pepper and serrano-walnut pesto with a sprinkling of pecorino-romano...say that three times fast) Hope to see you soon.