it all started with an apple tree, one paraplegic squirrel, a boyfriend with a fantastic wingspan, and a dream. i considered the possibility for about four minutes, then spent two more minutes congratulating myself on this sort of eagle scoutish thinking. the whole making due with my resources aspect of it.
step one: attach bucket to the end of a broom.
step two: grab a mop and tall boyfriend.
step three: stand together on deck. boyfriend whaps at apple tree, while i hold bucket under targeted apple.
step four: bake something apple flavored.
while fun, it didn't take long to figure out that instead of a cute story of swatting apples out of an apple tree -- and the mop 'n glow aftertaste -- this was going to turn into the story about the time i broke my neck showing off while channeling "on the banks of plum creek." and then, when i eventually moved to ground level and tried to estimate where the falling fruit would land, well ... let's just say i've always been better at different kinds of sports.
the fruits of my labor: meager.
anyway, there is a paraplegic squirrel living in the back yard who has found a way to shimmy to the roof without the use of his back legs. i think he needs these apples more than i do.
i decided to make apple crisp, but with, instead, apples from an apple store. i stood in the produce department holding the devil disguised as a small container of premade apple crisp, strategically placed by the granny smith's i was fingering. i carefully put it back on the shelf and backed away slowly from the cliff notes version of what i wanted to make.
whatever. so i spent the night chopping and peeling and and mixing and ended up with this:
then chuck said, using grand gestures to emphasize his point: maybe we should let it sit so it thickens.
so we watched the shining and waited.
then i very purposely made an "i'm concentrating and cutting" face.
it turned out really good.
i totally think i'm going to have more.
this is where i forgot to not put my cigarette in front of the camera when i took the photo.
instant replay of the cutting process.